Mom thoughts

I WISH THAT I KNEW WHAT I KNOW NOW WHEN I WAS YOUNGER.

 Younger 

Click the link and listen to this song.

I carried you in my belly for 9 months. I went through 13 hours of hard labor for my first son then sliced pelvic bone to pelvic bone for the last two. I wiped your ass for 3 years until you could do it for yourself. Through the hell off potty training even when u hid behind the couch to poop. Yea I knew, it was written all over your face.

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Logan bowling 2018

Even when dad yelled while potty training you and you tried to catch his flow lol. Glad I wasn’t there. I would have died laughing. When your brother played in a poopy potty seat because dad didn’t get to it fast enough. When you got your heart broke by your first girl and would only talk to dad about it.

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Dominic 1995

 

Mom went through it, I had my heart broken but you live through it. Mom wears her heart on her sleeve. It’s just a part of growing up. You all made it out of high school. Mom only had to go to one meeting that she wanted to kill a school advisor at. Man head start was so much easier. Reading books and going on field trips. Your excitement when you all saw your first cow 🐮. The huge smile my youngest had, when he got to sit on a huge tractor 🚜. All the great teachers that helped get you ready for regular school. Sad 😔 to say I was not ready for your first day. Or even graduation 👨‍🎓.

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Logan & Brian’s HS diplomas

 

Dom graduating from college and I couldn’t go. NYC way too scary for me. It was painful. You are my babies I didn’t want you to grow up. I still don’t.

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Dad and Mom 20th anniversary 2018

Your dad and I have stuck it out for all those years. I remember us really sticking together when I was pregnant. I woke up stuck to his back. I leaked breast milk all over him and we stuck together. He had very soft skin on his back in those days. Breast milk is good for your skin, who knew. That was not the only time my breast milk made us laugh. It was like torpedos in the shower it squirted every where. Even an innocent friend got it from across the room. Babies 👶 don’t help much with that. A turn of the head and it’s like a squirt gun. Look 👀 out anyone within 15 feet squirting distance. If you get squirted be happy 😊 you where the “chosen one “ lol 😆 In my defense you where in the wrong place at the wrong time. The people we hear 👂 that use it in their coffee ☕️ are just nasty 🤢. I don’t hangout with them. Damn weird os. You will get nowhere in life and mom wouldn’t approve. Not as if you ever listened to me much. I always over reacted but hey you survived I didn’t get you killed or hurt that much.

When it comes time for you to have children 👶 of your own I have a little bit of advice take it or leave it. I made it through many years with you all and I’m not completely grey or crazy 😜. Well crazy is still up for further discussion 😝 Some house advice, No matter how pretty the paint the cracks will show back up.

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Kitchen crack, Kirkwood house

Like in relationships find the inner problem don’t just cover it up. If left alone it just gets worse. Get a good alarm clock ⏰ you don’t want to miss anything. Take lots of pictures. Make a scrapbook they are very useful when you get older and your memory goes like dad’s. Also they are a great way to embarrass your kids when they bring special people home 🏠 to meet you. Potty training pics are the best.

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Christmas tree Kirkwood 2018

As I sit here on Christmas 🎄 2018. I think of all the fun stuff we’ve done through the years.

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Brian Jr & Skittlez summer 2018

 

All of the runs to the emergency room with Brian Jr when he was younger. The day in Sidney Dom tried to do a bunny hop on his bike. The day logan got cut above his eye. I almost passed out 😵 a few times seeing you guys get stitches. It was horrific. Someone causing pain to one of my babies 👶 “How dare they” !!!! Such brave boys through it all. Some fun along the way too. Dominic coming to see Jr after his ear surgery. The duck hat was precious. Everyone coming back from trick or treating in Sidney. All laughing because Jr fell and his Dixie horn went off. That was a great 🎃. So glad dad made Brian Jr’s General lee costume. The year in Sidney where we made all the fake head stones. I couldn’t believe people were stopping and taking pictures. It was awesome. I’d love to go back to those happy days. I hope you all have some memorable moments from childhood. To live it again would be Priceless. But as we all know if we could go back we would. So when you have your own kids don’t try to rush. You too will get to a day where your house is silent and you wonder where time went. This is life. We all live it. Try to enjoy it while you can and always remember I am just a phone call away. All the love in my heart goes to you and dad. Just wish grandpa could see you know all grown up. I’ll treasure the memories every day.

 

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Thanksgiving 2018 Logan and Brian Jr.
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Dominic & Kelsey
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All of us 2018
Mom thoughts

Experimenting with Dollar Tree deco mesh wreaths.

There are lots of videos on YouTube that will show you how to do this. I’ve watched lots and this is my version. I hope you find it helpful. If you have any questions just catch up with me on Facebook. To save money you can make your own work wreath. I use dollar tree wreath forms and I also get pipe cleaners there. I pre-prep all my pipe cleaners by cutting them in half. I also order 4 wreath forms at a time. I have delivered to my local store, for free. You can also have delivered to your house for a minimal fee. Pretty much all the supplies you will need to make a wreath you can get from that store. They even have awesome signs at Dollar Tree, that work perfect. Recently I got a lawn stake and just broke stick part off. Can’t even tell 🙂

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I do 9 on 2nd loop from top, then I do 7 on loop 4. Others do 18 on outer loop 3 on each of the 6 sections and 9 on second loop.  After doing a few you will find what works best for you. If using the cut method, the width of your mesh and size of your puffs decides amount of puffs. If your using an uncut mesh roll then just prepare pipe cleaners in advance. With that method it’s easier to just add as you go. Around 4 or 5 in each of the 6 sections. When you start connecting mesh I suggest using a zip tye. They are much stronger and you can pull them tigher. I would finish with one also. I connect onto 2 inner loops and only need to go around wreath once. Usually the 21” mesh uses just 1 roll. If you want it fuller just add more to each section. No rules just what you decide you like. Trial and error.

When doing the section version, I glue each spot with hot glue afterward. This helps them stay in place and makes work easier for you. Not moving around really helps. The finished product looks like this. Not too pretty but once you add all the mesh you don’t even see the ties. If you want you can match the colors of ties to mesh your using. So for just $2.00 + tax you have a work wreath. Online they are like $6 to $7 it’s ridiculous. So simple to make and doesn’t take much time. I found, many videos on youtube that go over this.

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Here are a few of my finished wreaths. They make great gifts 🎁 for Christmas 🎄. That’s what I did. Even can sell to friends and family.

This wreath was made for my cousin Jessica. She loved it.

This one went to my friend Christina.

8b2a7b47-a257-4c78-9b43-fc30522562c8My sister Laurie got this one. She loved it so much she bought one for a friend.

This one I made for my mother in law to thank her for getting everything organized for Thanksgiving. We really enjoyed seeing everyone in one spot. Especially meeting our new sister in law and the kids.

This is for my dear friend Lisa. We love her so much she’s such a great friend.

 If you wanted to find more supplies, I’ve purchased some from Joann’s or Michael’s. I joined their mailing lists and they send me great coupons. I also recently bought mesh from http://craftoutlet.com/ I’ll share more information on that once I get my order. One supply you won’t find at Dollar Tree would be a mesh holder. You would have to go to Susie’s

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Susie’s Mesh Rollers

I’m hoping to sell a few more wreaths this year. We will see. Everyone loves them and they are not that expensive to mail. I sent cousin Jessica’s to her and it only cost around $7. I’m hoping this inspires you to try and make your own wreath. They are very in expensive and a great activity to do with friends. I never thought I’d be able to make one but I did. I enjoy making them now. So many YouTube videos anyone can make them. On to Valentine’s Day wreaths now. But I’m loving making them. I’ll post all on my Facebook page Here. I post lots of great videos on that page also. Like they say sharing is caring 🙂

What was I thinking?

2018 another great year ? Maybe …

Just sitting and thinking on this frigid NY day. It’s getting close to the end of the year. Thinking how fast it went by. I’ve learned writing can help clear your mind and cleanse your soul. Goodbye to yesterday’s drama. Hello to a beautiful new day. More to explore more to learn.

Beautiful picture my friend posted on Facebook. So peaceful looking.

I’m learning not to let my older sister dim my shine. I have risen from her shadow and I’m doing great without her in my life. Life is better with less “cloudy” type people in it. There comes a time in life when you need to turn your back and walk away. Sadly you will loose contact with others involved but it’s for your growth and happiness. You don’t need that anchor around your waist. Wash your hands of it and walk away. It’s exhilarating not having that weight on your shoulders. It’s not being selfish it’s for self preservation. You will grow and realize they were not a necessity in your life. You will shine brighter without them around. You can be self sufficient and strong. On to better people that will shine with you and raise you up. Get out your sunglasses because it’s your time to shine. Someone holding you back just shake them off and continue on. Life is too short for people to hold you back just because they can’t see your shine. Distance might let them realize you don’t need them and are better without them. Keep close those that see where you are going and cheer you on.

I’m one of the lucky ones. My hubby stands with me and compliments me. He’s my rock. When he was in training for his CDL license I was his cheerleader. Encouraging and praising him along the way. Celebrating his achievements and letting him rest on my shoulder when he was tired. He made it through training and our family is better because of it. I’m proud of him and all the hard work he does for our family. He’s a strong family man who is loved by his 3 sons. I would be lost without him.

Recently I made him his favorite meal. Corned beef and cabbage yummy. Here is the recipe I used :

Ingredients

  • 1 corned beef brisket (3-4lbs)

  • 1 onion

  • 3 cloves garlic

  • 2 bay leaves

  • 2.5 – 3 cups water

  • 2 lbs potatoes , peeled & quartered

  • 2 large carrots , chopped

  • 1 small head of cabbage , cut into wedges

  • Here are the instructions :

    1. Chop onion into large chunks and place in the bottom of a 6 qt slow cooker. Top with corned beef and seasoning packet.

    2. Pour water into slow cooker until it just about covers the corned beef. Add garlic and bay leaves.

    3. Cook on low 8-10 hours.

    4. After the initial 3 hours, add potatoes and carrots to the slow cooker.

    5. Two hours before serving, add cabbage wedges to the slow cooker.

    6. Remove corned beef from slow cooker and let rest 15 minutes before slicing. Serve with potatoes, carrots and cabbage.

    I put everything in crockpot except cabbage and I didn’t use bay leaf. It was delicious. You can find more here : https://www.spendwithpennies.com/corned-beef-and-cabbage-slow-cooker-recipe/ Try it and let me know if you liked it. I’ll add another recipe to my next post.

    Hope your Thanksgiving was great as ours was. Hug your hubby and family tight and have a good night. Till next time.

    Mom thoughts, What was I thinking?

    I am ok. My life matters.

    What other people think does not determine your future destination.

    Internal struggle I have battled with my whole life. I’ve always been compared to my older sister. I realize now that I’m older I acted out as a child because I felt ignored. I was the flower in the top left corner of a huge wall of flowers. Hidden away treated like I was less. Not sure when these feeling first came about I must have been really young. When my parents split each of them took one of us my sister being the favorite, went with Mom. I was left with Dad and his soon-to-be wife. Trying to fit into their lives I felt like I didn’t belong, so I retreated into books. I tried at school, with little luck, to make friends. Another day another blog post, I’m not ready to open those old wounds.

    Morris, NYMorris, New York

    Biggest thing that I hated in foster care, was being moved to different foster homes. I started in Oneonta then story gets good. By the time I was released I had lived in Milford, South Valley and Morris. I’m still friends with first foster family from Oneonta. Their daughter is a good friend. People in Miilford didn’t care for very much. Next was South Valley to live with Becker family. Nancy the foster mom was a sweet heart. Then off to Morris to live with the Webster family. I loved it there. I was able to finally do cheerleading. It was awesome. I enjoyed it very much. I learned a lot about myself at that school. I had great friends some I still speak to this day. I tried to keep my nose clean and stay away from trouble. Although, I remember one instance of me being rebellious.  I left school during teacher strike and my friends covered me. I tried to walk to my sister’s foster home in Edmeston. Now that I look back it was stupid. Morris is a long way from Edmeston. Luckily a nice couple picked me up. They drove me to my sister’s school and dropped me off. I needed a release. I was angry. Got talked to by foster parents about how teachers were wrong to protest. That’s grownup business I really didn’t give a sh**. Now as a grown up I understand the importance.

    Otsego county had a program called “Independent living skills”. We got to do so much stuff and go to many places. We went to NYC to NYU. Also went to a few other colleges. My foster mother Carol was head of this group. I felt like I fit in finally. We went to Long Beach Island. It was my first experience enjoying the ocean. Big difference from NY hill I had grown up on. We learned about cooking, budgeting and cleaning. Everything we needed to know to leave foster care and go out on our own. One important thing it didn’t teach us was that on holiday vacations from college the dorms would close. If you didn’t stay connected to your foster family you had no place to go. My first grown-up realization that “adulting” sucks. Here I am over 20 years later and they still haven’t fixed that problem. It’s sad.

    Until next time Hug your trucker tight and try to get more enjoyment in your life.

    Kathy O.

    Mom thoughts

    I’m at a strange stage of life with an open road ahead and so many possibilities …

    Me and hubby.

    I’m at a strange stage of life with an open road ahead and so many possibilities. How do I choose what is right? Do I have to choose just one thing ? Such a dilemma. I hate making choices for fear of leaving someone behind or loosing a loved one. Every day it seems as if another page has turned. As a female, a mother and a wife it seems my days are full of decisions. Do I get another job? Do I wait and return to my last job? How will my decisions effect my sons? Where does my journey go from here? A million questions asked every day. Is their a book to help us on our journey ? Is their a group to give us support? What if we chose the wrong path ? Can we go back? Where can I find a guided path? Is their anyone out there that can provide guidance? These are all questions most of us are asking. I’m going to search the internet in hopes of answers. Maybe I can ask others that have already been where I am know. I will share my findings along the way. If anyone has any tips please share. I don’t know where I am headed but I pray for clarification along the way. I’ll write when my heart says to. I’ll share so if anyone follows it might help others. If anyone is on this journey too please reach out to me. A journey with friends is always a journey enjoyed.

    The best way to get things Done is simply Begin

    From Inspirational quotes Gazette

    My choices are easy for some but people like me that are indecisive are going to struggle. Maybe I should go easy way out and flip a coin. Maybe s roll of the dice. Close my eyes and pick from a list. Or better yet have hubby decide for me lol. I’m torn between what society would choose and what my heart says to do ☹️ I wonder how other people decide on big decisions ?? 🤔 In school they said make a list of pros and cons. One would stand out but what if they are equal ? Am I strong enough to choose both and let time figure it out? I asked my husband and he said he will support whatever decision I choose. He’s a very supportive man. My angel in work boots behind the wheel of a big rig. After 20 years I still get overwhelmed by the love I have for this man. He’s my rock my soulmate.

    This week closes a chapter in my life ☹️ Friday 11/23 is my last day of work for Aspira. I’m being laid off. Can reapply next year if I want to. My supervisor Lia Mebane says she hopes I do. I have other job opportunity with a tax firm. I just need to finish signing up. It’s January thru April with possibility of full year if I do good. Intellectual wise it will be more fulfilling since that’s what I went to college for. Emotionally not thinking it will fulfill my need to help others like this job does. It’s my dilemma of what is more important for me ??? Ugggg ☹️☹️ I am thinking hard but have no clue what to choose. I wish I could make money with my crafts that’s what I enjoy the most but no money in that. I’d love to write a book but not having much luck with that. It’s easy for those to share advice but there are no quick fixes. No magic pills. No prescriptions. Some of us fight this battle alone and some with a loved one. I’ve searched the internet for an instruction book and have had no luck I didn’t find classes to enroll into either. Some have moms that can help but my mom is ill equipped. She has good intentions but not much information. It’s due to the way she was raised. Her father was an alcoholic and very abusive. I’m sure they never talked about feelings or what was right in life. He chased my uncle away to join the military and he became a lifer. Sometimes it’s best to run away, murder does not look good on a resume. From what i’ve learned reconnecting with my uncle that could have happened. I personally think it would have been well deserved. Beating your tiny little wife is horrid. Back in those days it was a daily thing. I’m glad times have changed at least a little bit.

    Date night October20, 2018

    I’ve joined a facebook group called “Spiritual G Spot”. You can join it here https://www.facebook.com/groups/219129234948553/.
    The lady that runs it does motivating posts daily. I hope it encourages you to live your life fully. Like she says let your light shine and you can never be “Too much woman”. I’m hoping to go see her in person at Niagara Falls. Hubby knows where that is since he goes there every day for work.

    It’s a blessed day, 8 am is so peaceful maybe I’ll get up early from now on and write. Today is my last day of work. I have a 2 hour shift then I’m done 😦 for how long I’m not sure but it gives me time to focus on myself and what’s my next step. I will end this here and go enjoy my day. My oldest is here for Thanksgiving and I want to enjoy my time with him. Later he heads back to the Big city not sure when we will see him again. He brought his girlfriend with him and she’ s super nice. We also got to meet  Aaron’s new wife she is great. We plan on going to Mississippi soon to see them again.
    I hope everyone had a good Thanksgiving and I’ll be back soon. Just remember to hug your trucker tight. Mine has my heart and I will be sad Sunday when he returns to normal work. Until then I will enjoy him being around. Or at least until he pisses me off lol.

    Mom thoughts, What was I thinking?

    Trivia and Taco Tuesday

    Here are a few questions no one ever asks but were bugging me. Click on the blue words for links to more information. This is perfect for family night trivia. I’ve also added a yummy taco recipe for you to enjoy together 🤩

    crayons-coloring-book-coloring-book-159570

                                                      Everyone remembers crayons from their childhood.
    1. When were crayons invented? 1903
    2. What year did the first KFC open? 1930
    3. When was first cell phone call ? 1973
    4. When was cyanide discovered? 1782
    5. What nut has highest calories ? Macadamia
    6. How many hairs on the average blonde head? 150,000 more than any other hair color.
    7. How many calories in a 7-11 chocolate covered donut? 250
    8. What was the length of world’s longest fingernails ever recorded ? 28 ft 4 inches
    9. What’s the highest score you can get on your SAT ? 2400
    10. What brand of beer has the lowest carbs? Budweiser select 55
    11. At what age did the oldest recorded human die? Jeanne Calment 122 years 16 months
    12. How old was the oldest dog ? Bluey from Australia 29 years 5 months
    13. When was the color Chartreuse formulated? 1987
    14. When was the first Hershey bar with almonds made ? 1908
    15. What does the word “vermicelli” means in Italian ? Thin Worms
    16. What was the fattest cat named cat ? Himmy from Australia 46.8 lbs
    17. What’s the smallest tree? Dwarf Willow 
    18. What building is the tallest in world today? Burj Khalifa in Dubai
    19. What’s mph of fastest car as of 2018? Hennessey Venom F5 301 mph
    20. Where is the world’s smallest house ? In London it’s 188 ft
    21. Where were gummy bears created ? Germany early 1920’s
    22. When was first dishwasher made? 1886 (no kids don’t count)
    23. How many names are written around the base of Eiffel Tower ? 72
    24. What state is it legal to hunt unicorns? Michigan
    25. How do I upset Siri ? Calling her Alexa or Cortana

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     How did she wash her hair??? Gross

    As promised here is a taco recipe. I found it at Dinner at the Zoo’s blog post. Link is after recipe.

    GROUND BEEF TACOS

     Prep Time 10 minutes
     Cook Time 10 minutes
     Total Time 20 minutes
     Servings 4
     Calories 304 kcal

    Ingredients

      • 2 teaspoons vegetable oil
      • 1 pound lean ground beef I use 90% lean
      • 1/2 cup onion finely chopped
      • 1 tablespoon chili powder
      • 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
      • 1/4 teaspoon onion powder
      • 1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes optional
      • 1/4 teaspoon dried oregano
      • 1/2 teaspoon smoked paprika
      • 1 teaspoon ground cumin
      • 1 teaspoon salt
      • 1/2 teaspoon pepper
      • 1 14 ounce can petite diced tomatoes drained
      • 8 taco shells
    • assorted toppings such as lettuce, tomato, onion and shredded cheese

    Instructions

    1. Heat the oil in a large pan over medium high heat.
    2. 2 .Add the ground beef and break up with a spatula.
    3. Add the onion to the pan.
    4. Cook, stirring occasionally, until beef is done and onion is soft, 5-6 minutes.
    5. Drain off any excess fat.
    6. Add the chili powder, garlic powder, onion powder, red pepper flakes, oregano, smoked paprika, cumin, salt and pepper to the pan.
    7. Stir to coat the meat in the seasonings.
    8. Add the tomatoes to the pan and simmer for 2-3 minutes.
    9. Spoon the beef into the taco shells and add toppings such as lettuce, tomatoes and cheese.

    Serve immediately.

    Nutrition Facts
    Ground Beef Tacos
    Amount Per Serving
    Calories 304 Calories from Fat 117
    % Daily Value*
    Total Fat 13g20%
    Saturated Fat 5g25%
    Cholesterol 70mg23%
    Sodium 549mg23%
    Potassium 525mg15%
    Total Carbohydrates 19g6%
    Dietary Fiber 2g8%
    Sugars 1g
    Protein 26g52%
    Vitamin A14.3%
    Vitamin C1.8%
    Calcium4.9%
    Iron 21.4%
    * Percent Daily Values are based on a 2000 calorie diet.
    Here is a direct link to their page. Go check it out. Dinner at the zoo
    I hope you enjoy this trivia and these tacos. I personally have never tried this recipe. I do a basic no measure one. I brown 1 1/2 pounds ground beef and ground turkey mix. The turkey helps lower the calories. I rinse off grease then add water as called for on the packet. Sometimes we use Old El Paso other days we use a generic brand. I cut up normal lettuce, tomato, shredded cheese. If we are doing soft tacos I sometime heat up a can of black beans. Rinse and strain before use. The slime at he bottom of the can can make you lose your appetite. We serve sour cream on the side if anyone wants it. Sometimes we substitute ground meat with boneless skinless chicken breast. Cut into small pieces of course. Buffet style set up is best. Lots less mess to clean up. Paper plates or styrofoam plates are good to use. We have a back deck that is perfect for this meal. My boys and hubby really enjoy these relaxed type of meals. Know I have trivia questions to ask hem. Who knows maybe it will start a new family tradition. Possibly can do on a Saturday night since everyone has those off from work. Can put a blanket own on he floor in our living room for cold New York nights. It would kinda be like a picnic. It might be fun for everyone.
    taco

    We could even do it in our pj’s. I buy us a pair every year for Christmas Eve. I usually get matching ones from Kohl’s but this year I’m going to try target. That is my new favorite store. I signed up on a whim my last visit. They gave me a credit card and I earned $10 in gift cards with my last purchase. They have great sales and have a good coupon policy. They allow you to match paper coupons with digital ones using their cartwheel app. You can find it described more by following this link. If I can ever figure out how to fix my Apple ID I would download it again. Something to add to my ever growing To Do list. I have a few more wreaths to make for friend and family gifts first. I hope they like them. I enjoyed making them. The tri colored one I’m thinking of adding a small chalkboard to it. Can write Merry Christmas on it or whatever suits your fancy. Maybe you would prefer it in Polish like our friends the Lis family. Either way you get to choose.

    Wesołych Świąt
    If you have a favorite recipe feel free to share it with me. Maybe next time I’ll post your recipe. As always hug your trucker tight. I’m sure he will enjoy these tacos after a long run and might even know the trivia answers too.
    Kathy O.
    Mom thoughts, What was I thinking?

    How lonely that would be.

    Without you …

    Brief early morning thoughts I wanted to share. I’m sure many other people know exactly what I’m talking about. To those people it’s ok to stuff it in further or let it out. Happiness is like a fluttering butterfly. Grab it while you can before it passes you by. We don’t know when we will get to see it again. Hold it tight and memorize it in hopes of mimicking it. We can control some of our happiness so choose today to keep it.

    In the middle of all my happiness there is a bit of sadness. Reach in push it down. Not today sadness it’s my happy day. I will deal with you later. For today I choose to be happy. I want to enjoy life. Sadness is a thing of the past I don’t want to deal with it. I’m enjoying my time snuggled all up in bed with my hubby. He’s so warm it invites sleep swiftly. As I drift off into happy sleep my last thought is how much I love my husband. How he makes my life complete and I need to remind him. Without him it would just be me and how lonely that would be.

    Till later have a blessed day and hug your trucker tight ❤️❤️❤️

    What was I thinking?

    Today’s random thoughts.

    I remember the boys when they were younger. Boxes pots and pans an orchestra in the kitchen. So easy to entertain like my kitty nowadays. Simpler back then.

    Racing matchbox cars playing in the mud. Cheaper too. No xbox or ps 1 with monthly online fees. No cellphones. Cup phones worked just as good. I even remember walkie talkies in your choice of characters Power Rangers to Voltron. As I had boys I think we had a set like these. Now being sold on eBay at a discount price. Maybe I should order for Christmas since I still have 2 sons home. Now they have an app for phones that does the same. My youngest won’t use cell phones. Something about them causing brain damage. Here’s a link you can research for yourself . https://www.cancer.gov/about-cancer/causes-prevention/risk/radiation/cell-phones-fact-sheet. There is so much information online I could spend next 20 years deciphering it. I’m just going to say it comes down to personal preference. Too much we just don’t know and too much wrong information. You decide.

    That’s my thoughts for today. Remember to hug your trucker and kids really tight. They are your first line of defense from a creepy nursing home. As for my husband I go where he goes. Makes life a lot simpler for me. No major solo decisions for me. We are a team. We raised our 3 boys together. So we get to sit back and enjoy them grow into men. Such a blessing they are. Educated and trouble free. No jail time for any of them. I hope they follow their dreams and not forget fun they had in the mud !!!

    What was I thinking?

    My inner journey has begun. ” The cows are gone, but the barn still stands.”

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    Not sure where I got this picture but it spoke to me.

     

    The cows are gone. But the barn still stands where ma and pa left it 10 years ago. Kids all raised and moved on but the barn she still stands just like I remember from growin up years past. The blizzard of 59 with drifts up to 7 feet high. I spoke to a friend that went through it. She remembers clear as day helping her grandfather. His old car was buried and she helpt dig it out. Only way out of your house was through upstairs window. Pity the people that lived in single story houses. They were completely shut off from everything till the first thaw. Must have felt like they were in the twilight zone. Finally a day off of school. Ma found extra chores for us. Lest we get bored and cause a ruckus. Dad don’t like lots of noise. He’d get the belt out since we had no way to go outback and fetch a switch.

    Il Fuorn, Lawine vor dem Hotel (22.1.1951)

    Here is similar picture from 1951. Found here : Datei:Lawinenwinter 1951 Il Fuorn.jpg – Wikipedia de.wikipedia.org

    I remember those days just like it was yesterday. Ma told us stories about when she was younger. She had to walk 2 miles to get to school. There was no hot meals for lunch. You ate what was in your pail and didn’t complain. Dad wanted to raise up Godly men and ma was dead set on growing up the girls all nice and proper. Not like the kids nowadays. Education was important but barn chores came first. First day of fall harvest all boys missed school. The harvest was dad’s “bread and butter” since they closed the rail yard. No jobs anywhere it was rough. Ma tried to get work at the big houses but they had none. She thought maybe mending or cleaning but nothing to be found. Dad would take the boys over yonder hill to hunt. A scrawny bunny or a greasy weasel was a treat for Sunday meal. We’d sit around the table taking turn reading scriptures from the big family bible. It’s been in our family since grandpa came over from Ireland around 200 or so years ago. Such a proud man he was. Pa had his pocket watch nicely shined sitting on the stand by his bed when we were younger. After he passed it was given to the oldest boy along with his tool box. Those where simpler days when no one had to fear a drive by shooting our someone stealing your kin. Crap we deal with today not even imagined way back then.

    I desire for the simpler times. My hubby says it sounds like a memory remembered. From past years maybe the 20’s. It all started when I saw a friends pictures she posted on Facebook. I had to write or my mind was going to implode. I was born in mid 70’s and we didn’t live on a farm. Totally different then my childhood. Here’s an excerpt about what my childhood was like. Grab a cup of coffee and comfy blanket. I’ve heard worse stories but what can I say we don’t choose our childhoods or our parents …

    Here’s a brief peek into my past.

    My internal struggle I have battled with my whole life. I’ve always been compared to my older sister. I realized know that I’m older I acted out as a child because I felt ignored. I was the flower in the top left corner of a huge wall of flowers. Hidden away treated like I was less. Not sure when these feeling first came about I must have been really young. My sister was every bodies favorite. Mom chose her to live with her. I was left behind to live with dad, his new wife and their 5 kids. Just a flower on the wall. Minimal, insignificant. I hid myself in books trying to stay in the background. I tried at school with little luck to get friends. When I was in foster care I had many more friends. I kept my nose clean and stayed away from trouble. I remember being rebellious when I lived in Morris, NY. I left school during teacher strike and my friends covered me. Tried to walk to my sister’s foster home in Edmeston. Know that I look back it was stupid. Morris is a long way from Edmeston. Luckily a nice couple picked me up and drove me to her school. I needed a release. I was angry. Got talked to by foster parents about how teachers where wrong to protest. That’s grownup business why bother me with it? I really didn’t care .

     


    Morris, NY

    Here’s a picture of Morris, NY. Follow link for more information. https://www.nps.gov/nr/feature/places/pdfs/13000031.pdf

    Biggest thing that I hated was being moved to different foster homes. I started in Oneonta then story gets real good. By the time I was released I had lived in Milford, South Valley and Morris. I’m still friends with first foster family from Oneonta. Their daughter is a good friend. People in Milford didn’t care for very much. Next was South Valley to live with Becker family. Then off to Morris to live with the Webster family.

    I can’t finish my story since I’m not good with dealing with past issues. The first story is my dream past. Only in my imagination. Not sure where I’ll be in 5 years or even 5 months. I’m growing and learning about me so it’s all up hill from here. My hubby will be by my side helping me grow along for the ride he never expected.

    For know hug your hubby tight if you get the feeling you need to write something down DO IT. We grow by learning and letting things go is hardest step to take. To a better future for me and my family. Great things are yet to come and I’m trying to enjoy my journey. Join me and we can learn together one step at a time. I got my comfy slippers on and off we go……

    This is my picture with my slippers. So comfy.

    Mom thoughts

    Sensory Processing Disorder – what worked for us.

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    Here is our 3 boys playing monopoly. Jr is in red shirt. (2010 Sidney house)

    My youngest son has sensory processing disorder and we have tried multiple therapy ideas with him in the past 16 years. The best therapy we found was a swing shaped like a laundry bag with 2 open sides. We hooked it up in our basement at the Sidney house. It was very helpful when he was over stimulated. He’d swing until he was calm. We also used a bumpy seat cushion, a ball seat with legs and sand paper. At school he had gum to chew to keep him from being fidgety. I also got erasers you can disassemble and put back together. They didn’t last long he got bored and was throwing them.

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    Looking through pictures I think he’s always wearing blue.

    We have learned to pick your battles. The clinking of metal silverware really bothers him. So we go to restaurants that use plastic silverware one where kitchen is further away from seating area. For special occasions we can’t avoid those restaurants. We would tell him a few days in advance and talk again day of meal. With positive reinforcement we have avoided major meltdowns. Advance preparation is the key. No surprises for him. I can only remember one instance that I was not able to avoid a meltdown. I took him to church and they had really loud music. I tried distracting him with paper and crayons. It did not work. He curled up in a ball and hid under the pew. We excuse ourselves and left earlier. Another time before he was 5 the fire alarm went off at the dentist office. Loud screeching noises and flashing lights. My poor child. Fast as a mouse he ran to a corner away from people. He sat down pulled up his knees and covered his ears. It was upsetting. He pretty much was in the fetal position. To this day he hates the dentist. We even changed offices 😦

    Products we have found to help during his growing up have been limited. Here is a link to online store where we found awesome products for sensory issues. https://www.southpaw.com We got a swing thru them and it was like night and day. It really helped Brian Jr a lot. Other items we bought from them was Feetballs pictured here. He used it at home when he was using the computer. He could wiggle all he wanted and it never tipped like a regular chair would. We also used a Fitball seating disc. I sent to school so he could use there. It helped him keep attention longer. Tri-grip pencils really helped also. Order a catalog they have tons of items for sensory issues. 

    feet balls

    I’ve been doing some research online to see what has helped other parents. People are very supportive nowadays. When jr was first diagnosed we got a lot of crap. People didn’t understand that he was not choosing to act this way. I kept getting told ways to discipline him the old fashioned way. I chose not to do those ways. Why discipline a child for something he couldn’t control ? That’s like punishing him for having brown hair. Not going to happen by me.

    Here are some remarks from my Facebook friend Denise on what has helped for her son. He was diagnosed with Aspergers. She says “They had my son listen to 20 minutes of classical music at school before he was sent to class. It seemed to calm him. He also had three safe places at school. If he ever felt overwhelmed, he was allowed to get up and just walk out and go straight to one of his safe places without asking. This kept him calm. He got to pick his 3 places. One of them was the vice principal’s office. That’s the one he used the most. So they had a little chair over in the corner. And he could just walk in and sit there without anyone saying anything to him. So safe places work. Another good therapy is actual therapy. My son was on Medicaid. So it may depend on the insurance. But Medicaid actually sends therapist around to schools. My son’s therapist would pull him from one of his less important classes (like art or music or P.E.) once a week to talk to him. It was free of charge to me. Sometimes these therapists can offer suggestions on exercises they can do to concentrate more or to stabilize their moods. Another thing that helps is rewards for good behavior. For instance at my son’s school, they purchased a PlayStation for him. And if he was able to go so many hours without having an episode, he was allowed so many minutes on the PlayStation. They had it set up in one of the rooms not used for teaching. Also my school provided my son an adult shadow to sit with him in class. She couldn’t help him with his work. But she was there to kind of guide him. For instance if he would space out, she’d tell him to take out his book and pencil. Stuff like that. They also allowed him to go only half a day once he got into high school. So he would have the special needs bus bring him home at lunch. Because high school can be overwhelming for a regular teen, can you imagine how overwhelming it is for a child with aspergers? Well he’s an adult now. Out in the world. If it wasn’t for his amazing teachers/school staff coming up with all of these great ideas during his IEP meetings, it would’ve been hard. He was sent four hours away when he was 7 to the medical university in Charleston. Because for several years before that, the doctors couldn’t get his diagnosis right. Once he was hospitalized for a week, his aspergers was brought to light and life got easier. There was no more uncertainty. When he turned 18, I finally put in for him to get SSI pay. He was approved in two months. Because of the referral letters submitted from the doctors, therapist and a lady at our local department of disability and special needs center. Everyone has always been so supportive.”

    This past June Brian graduated from high school with a regents degree. I remember a man saying “Every kid that he’s seen go into the Boces program ended up in jail by their 18th birthday.” He was CSE chairperson in Sidney and this was over 10 years ago.  Needless to say he was fired. It was a conference call and Jr’s therapist heard it. Guy was a horrible person. He never should have been in a position of authority for special needs kids. So for all the parents out their with a special needs kid “NEVER give up. You can prove negative remarks wrong and do miracles for your kids.” We never gave up fighting and never will. God gave us Brian Jr as a gift. It has been amazing to see how far he has come. he even got his driving permit this week. He was laughing because other teens at DMV took almost 1/2 to do test. It’s 20 questions – 30 minutes really? Makes you wonder type of people we have out there driving on our roads. Jr will climb mountains and fight dragons for the rest of his life. Mom and dad will be right besides him fighting with him. Take 30 minutes out of your week and have a 1 on 1 conversation with a special needs child. You will be surprised how awesome they really are if you take the time with them. If you have any questions feel free to leave a comment. We are a community raising these angels and need to support each other. Join me in this fight it’s so worth it.

    Till next time hug your hubby really tight. Mine is my first line of defense in this crazy world. Stick tight to those that support you and those that don’t they can “Kiss my britches” hugs to all. Have a great week.

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    His diploma arrived from school and dad was proud to present it to him.